They All Laughed by Mouhcina Begum

They All Laughed
By, Mouhcina Begum
I remember when I couldn’t even think straight when people were laughing and talking quietly behind me. I always thought they were talking about me. It was just that one insecurity that bothered me for months. Whenever I had to walk home alone I was scared. Not because I was afraid of being alone. I was afraid of the vehicles and people walking/driving past me looking at me and thinking negatively. One comment I mostly received from others was that I was ugly. They started calling me ugly at a very young age so I did not understand. It was when I first started high school I cared about my appearance more than anything. At the time I thought wearing face loads of make up was ok because I looked good. My friends realized the amount of make up I was wearing and told me I should not be wearing that much. I never listened to my friends because I thought I knew what was best for me, even my mum complained to me. Now I know that they were right.
After I settled in high school, I noticed the less make up I wore, the less effort and time it took. I was only 12 years old and no one that age should have been wearing the amount of make up I had on. Sometimes I applied a bit of mascara now and then, but that’s because I’m a girl. That is what girls usually do (not saying all girls are the same). Now that I am getting older (I am a teenager) I realize school is more about learning than impressing others. Honestly, I do not care about what others think of me at all. Some of the girls give me looks and call me names. People constantly come up to me asking me if any of the rumors are true but I just smile and walk away. Even if someone has made my day awful, I just smile because that it was I do best. 
When I’m hurt I obviously tell someone as I do not keep my feelings to myself. The first person I usually tell is one of my friends I can trust. Talking about my problems to people I can definitely trust makes me feel so much better, I have 5 friends because I feel like if I keep my circle small, the less I have to worry. I have other friends, a lot of them. But my true friends are my 5 girlies. I’ve had a few fall outs with them but I think everyone has arguments with their best friends or friends, even if it is just about small things like borrowing clothes (which me and my mum usually argue about!) or the smallest thing like not removing shoes in the living room.
What I have learned from high school (even though I have only been in high school for almost 2 years now) is that times will be tough and you will have fall outs and arguments. One thing TV has taught me is that “your true friends are there from the beginning to the end”

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